My Daily Dare has become the neglected stepchild. How sad. I set my goal to tackle one scary obstacle per day and after less than a handful, I stopped writing. I never stopped facing my fears. The irony, or side effect, of writing about my fears is that I quit being a person who is afraid to do stuff. When I started the blog, I genuinely felt limited in my actions because fear would grip my psyche in its tenacious claws and hold me back. After a few brave challenges, I realized that days had gone by without my pausing to allow fear to sink in. I just took action without premeditation.
What does this mean? Am I now the superwoman I envisioned? Kind of.
Being afraid of stuff is no longer my thing. I should bottle this prescription and sell it to the masses. If you publicly announce a weakness, write about it, then it quits being the big scary monster looming in your brain. Cured!
We are building a house. My character has always been defined by the fact that I am a person afraid of heights. I am no longer that person. I jump around on scaffolding, barely blink when climbing on the roof, and don’t break out in a sweat when I stand thirty feet in the air on decking with no railing. It’s not a big deal anymore.
But it’s not just my fear of heights that has gone by the way of the dodo bird. When my husband is gone, I can be alone at night without having all the lights glaring and my baseball bat in the bed beside me. I now sleep instead (I admit, I do leave on a nightlight).
I killed a spider all by myself. Just stomped its ass and didn’t even think before my shoe came down on its creepy little head.
I walk through our acreage in flip flops, totally unconcerned about snakes, mice, ticks, and other unknown, but still scary, flesh-eating vermin and reptiles.
And the kicker? I forget to use hand-sanitizer after touching grocery carts, doorknobs, and ATM buttons. That one is probably stupid because I’ve been sicker than a dog for the last ten days. Good hygiene should never be confused with fear.
So, I have no idea what is going to become of this blog. Maybe I should write about something else. Or, maybe I’m too busy living my life to write about it. I like that!